This One Goes to 11

Every year on May 23, my mom calls to wish me a happy anniversary. It is not my wedding anniversary (that’s December 29…this year will be 25). Eleven years ago today I was officially ordained in the Conservative Congregational Christian Conference (aka CCCC or the 4C’s). I have been in pastoral ministry a bit longer (13 years total). But seeing that today marks 11 years with the CCCC, a group of people I love and respect and am very proud to be affiliated with, I thought I would share eleven things I have been learning in that time.

1. The importance of having spiritual fathers and mothers. Pastors are spiritual parents to the people in their church and community. But it is just as important that pastors have spiritual mentors as well. Who is pastoring the pastor? That is a very important question. You are never so good that you should not be the student to someone else.
2. Be open to being friends with the people in your church. This may seem like a no brainer, but it runs counter to the opinion of many. I cannot be a spiritual father to people who I remain personally distant from. Yes, people may turn on you. Yes, people can take advantage of that. But love is a risky thing, and it is just as much caught as it is taught.
3. Life-on-life discipleship. Because Christianity is a way of life it is learned in living life. It is one thing to learn what the Bible teaches, it is something else to live it out. Therefore discipleship needs to be something more than a program or a small group or something that only happens in formal settings. It is relational.
4. Be patient. Things rarely happen in the timeframe we planned them to.
5. The fruit of the spirit is grown in adversity. You can’t learn forgiveness without being hurt and offended. You can’t learn long suffering if there is no suffering that lasts long. You cannot learn how to love your enemies if you have none. Adversity, challenge, headaches, heartaches, are not necessarily signs that things are going badly. They are opportunities to incarnate God’s love and to learn how to love your neighbor as yourself.
6. You can only work with people where God is at work in those people. A person may have a dozen areas that you feel need addressed but they are only concerned about one or two, and not the one or two you are most concerned about. Work where the Spirit is working in persons, not where you wish He were working in them.
7. You are going to mess up. Have the humility to admit when you do, the meekness to listen to criticism, and ask for forgiveness.
8. It is one thing to listen to criticism, it is another thing to act on it. Prayerfully think through feedback that you get—especially negative feedback. Take what is good, and forget what is bad. You are never going to please everyone.
9. Pastors are not super Christians, do not expect them to be or assume that they are. If you do, you will be disappointed.
10. Keep learning. Read, read, read. You will be the same person you are today 5 years from now except for two things: the people you meet and the books you read. When you stop learning, you start dying.
11. Life is about learning two lessons: 1). You are not enough. You were never meant to be enough, and you never will be enough. 2). Jesus is enough. And when you have Him you will always have enough.