Two Heads Are Better Than One

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken (Ecclesiastes 4:12, NIV).

Last week in my post I Am Not Enough, I shared with you two really important facts of life: 1). If you are warm and breathing you are going to have problems, and 2). When you are done with the problems you have you are going to have new ones—and they will probably be worse! My problems are not haphazard happenings of chance. God knew what problems I would have today and He knows what problems I will have tomorrow. Psalms 139:16 (NLT) says, You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. God gives us problems to break us down to make us sour and bitter but so He can build us up to make us better and sweeter. Knowing that doesn’t make your problems go away and it doesn’t make them any less difficult, but it does make your problems look a lot different.

Yesterday my wife was going to be working late. I was really looking forward to getting the kids to bed early. Last week was hard, this week is hard, next week will be hard. So I was looking forward to being by myself and watching the season finale of NCIS. But a friend of mine who knew some of the problems I have wanted to come over with a couple of smoky treats (i.e. cigars) and keep me company. I was really looking forward to being alone with my problems, but one of the things I have been learning is when you hear yourself saying you should avoid people because you are feeling miserable or suffering, that is a sure sign that you need to be around people.

When we are in pain it often seems our impulse is to react by retracting, withdrawing, or isolating ourselves. There is something innate about this response right? When we pull back, reign ourselves in, and curl up in a ball (literally or figuratively) we are just trying to protect ourselves.

Now, don’t misunderstand me here. I’m not saying there is never a time to be alone when you are hurting. Personally, I have a very mean introvert streak, being alone is often how I recharge. So far be it from me to down play the importance of times of solitude.

What I am trying to get at is that when we get that idea in our head that we don’t feel like being around people, or we don’t want to bother people, we probably need to be around people. Ecclesiastes 4:12 explains the reason why. When we have support, encouragement, and help from others, we are strengthened. When we fall down, it is a lot easier to get back up when there is someone offering their hand to help us up. It is a whole lot easier to get an accurate perspective on our problems when we have another set of eyes. It is a lot easier to have hope for overcoming your problems when you have someone who has been through similar difficult times themselves help you see what you can do. And it is a lot harder to stay depressed when you have people cheering you on, encouraging you and helping you to laugh along the way.

I did get together with my friend and we enjoyed a cigar and a whiskey together and I’m glad I did. The next time that happens to you, I hope you say yes too.