Why isn’t God answering my prayers to rescue me from this suffering?

This is the fourth post in this week’s series of posts where I have been addressing some of the questions that are often represented by the question: “Why is this happening to me?” Monday I looked at the question, “What did I do wrong to deserve this?” Tuesday I looked at “Why is God punishing me?” Today’s question is, “Why isn’t God answering my prayers to rescue me from this suffering?”

When I am asked this question, one of the first places I lead the questioner to is 2 Corinthians 12:7-9,

Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

This passage speaks to the question in three ways:

First, it teaches that it is ok to ask God to relieve you from suffering. Paul here asked God to take away his “thorn in the flesh” not once, not twice, but three times. Paul had good reason to think this was an appropriate prayer. God encourages us to make that prayer in Psalms 50:15 (NIV) saying call on me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you will honor me. He promises in Psalms 91:14-16 (NIV) “Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.” James exhorts the same in James 5:13 (NIV) saying, Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray. David prayed time and time again for God to rescue him from suffering throughout the Psalms. Even Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane prayed to the Father saying, Abba, Father, everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will” (Mark 14:36, NIV). If David, Paul, James, and even Jesus can pray that prayer, certainly it is ok for us to ask God for relief too.

Second, it teaches that there are times when the Father’s answer is “No.” Three times Paul prayed for his suffering to be relieved, and three times God said “No.” Even Jesus had to accept that to be totally obedient to His Father’s will, He could not pass the cup placed before Him. We need to understand that when God says no, that is His answer to our prayer. It does not mean He did not hear it, or that He is too busy at the moment, or that He has stopped loving you. No is just as much an answer as yes is.

Third, it teaches us why God says no. God’s answer to Paul’s prayer is in verse 9, My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. For God’s love, power, and glory to shine brightest, Paul needed to look weak. And what was Paul’s response to this? Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. What I have been learning is that there are some things that can only be learned in the midst of suffering. If I want to be learning forgiveness, I must be willing to be offended. If I want to be learning to love as God loves, I must love my enemies. For me to love my enemies I have to have enemies to love. For me to be learning that I can trust God to provide all that I need, I need put in the position where it is clear that I am unable to provide for my needs. If I want to be learning to be merciful as He is merciful, I need to be put in the position where mercy can be shown, and that is always a painful position. As Paul says in Romans 5:3-5 (NIV),

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

These seasons of suffering that we are tempted to think are the end of us, become the very things that build our perseverance, and character, and hope. They are the very things that make us the people we want to become. The more like Christ you want to become, the greater the challenges and disappointments you will have along the way. But the reward will be greater than the disappointments: the more like Christ you will have become, and the more joy and happiness you will have secured along the way.